Body Language: Wait, What'd You Say?
- Taylor Stackhouse
- Sep 1, 2025
- 6 min read
We all want to understand our dogs, and I think most of us believe we do. Until we stumble across some random Facebook video or a so-called "dog person" (who owns nothing but goldfish) says something about your dog's behavior.
Then you start questioning yourself: my dog "mlems" a lot...but I just saw lip licking is a stress signal, is my dog stressed all the time? What's "whale eye"? They're wagging their tail, they must be happy, right? What is body language?
Don't panic. Keep reading to see my break down of behaviors, what they could mean, and what you can do to make sure Fido is happy and comfortable.
Tails Up Gents, It's Milkbone Hour!
Dog tails...they're the first thing people (usually) look for when trying to read a dog's body language. But, the tail means a lot of different things, more than just a wag vs. a tuck. Here's a break-down:
Tail up and wagging: Loose wagging tails are the pinnacle of happy-dogness. If the tail is loose and being swept in wide, long arches, they're happy and relaxed. A super happy pup may wag so fast their whole butt wiggles, which is the best.
Slow, even wag: Here's the hiccup: your dog stops dead in their tracks, body tense, and that tail is still wagging, but slow and stiff. Usually this indicates a stressed, alert, or cautious dog.
Tucked and low: Most people recognize this signal right off: the dog is scared or nervous and needs some space.
Lend Me An Ear?
Ears are another great way to read a dog, they speak volumes when you take the time to notice. For dogs with long or cropped ears, you can look at the base for indicators of their emotion.
Forward, erect: This position, as you might imagine, expresses interest, intent, listening. The dog is focusing on something, positive or not depends on other body language and context.
Flat against the head: A flat-eared dog is usually stressed or anxious. Whether it's a vet exam or an uncomfortable hug, this indicates they're nervous and need a little space or reassurance.
Relaxed and low: The dog is relaxed, content, enjoying some peace and quiet.
It's All In The Body
Whole body signals are key to understanding body language, and while they're subtle they are powerful. Here's what to look for:
Loose, wiggly, jumpy: All these indicate a happy pup who's ready to play, is enjoying your current activity, or is generally pleased with life. Great job!
Tense muscles, tight mouth: This is a stressed dog, one that needs some space, is unsure of their surroundings, or feels threatened by something. It's important to give them some space or time, or remove the uncomfortable object.
Low head, drooped rear, low body: Again, a sign the dog is uncomfortable. They're probably afraid or nervous and need some reassurance or space.
Okay, Dog Pictures Please...
Now you've had a crash course in the very basics of signals and what they could mean. Here's some examples:
This dog is content and relaxed. Notice the soft eyes, casually alert ears, and relaxed body. The muscles are not tense in his body or face, and he's happily chewing on his ball.
Tension is all around this dog, even in his owner's position. The dog's ears are back, his lips are pulled back tightly, head is lowered, and his body is rigid.
Alert, smiling, relaxed face, this pup is ready for the next adventure. And being a Border Collie, will probably beat you to the car.
While the hat is cute, the whale eye is not. This pup is stressed and uncomfortable. Note the tight mouth, tense forehead, and the massive amount of whites showing in his eyes (this is called whale eye, and is a common indicator of stress).
These are just a few of the examples you might experience with your dog. For more examples, I recommend watching Fear Free Happy Home's body language video on Youtube. Now that I know a few basics, what do I do about it?
The Dog Language Puzzle, Put Together: Remember Context
It's a lot of pieces to put together I grant you, but once you start noticing subtle things in your dog's body language, you'll know what they're feeling and after this section, you'll know what you can do for your dog.
Context is key, it's a puzzle with multiple pieces that indicates a dog's feelings. "Mlems", as they're called, can be a sign the dog is relaxed, unless the whole picture of the dog involves tense body, low head, pulling away, and other signs of stress. Is the dog being hugged? Is there a stranger around they don't know? Think about what's happening around and to the dog, think about how you might feel.
Happiness:
When they're happy, loose, and wiggly, play with them! Encourage a game of tug, do some training, go for that hike together. Dogs love adventure, they love to be with their people, so really anything you do with your dog will make their day.
If they're a couch potato and their idea of adventure is trying the peanut butter Milkbone over the bacon, then sit on the couch together and watch a movie, or go bask in the sun on the patio (calling all bully breed owners). Dogs enjoy your company, they're not called "man's best friend" for no reason. The simplest activities can make a dog's day as long as it's with their person.
Scared or anxious:
You're out for a walk and suddenly your dog tucks tail, tenses up, and starts moving behind you. What now?
If you can see what your dog is afraid of, simply move away if you can. Create space between you and the object (or person) and place your dog on the side of your body away from their fear. Walk away from the fear and give your pup a little reassurance as they come out of their tension.
Or if your dog is afraid of people coming up and petting them, again, create space. Explain to people that your dog is nervous and doesn't like to be pet. If the dog does show interest, ask people not to shove their hand in the dog's face, and wait for the dog to come to their loose, at-the-side hand and maybe they can try a gentle snuggle under the chin. Dogs don't like being pet on the top of their head by unknown people, and who could blame them?
You can work through these fears, but remember, once your dog is already showing this level of fear or stress, you won't make progress. True progress in countering fears and anxieties starts well away from the feared object before the dog is, as we say, "over threshold." So take notes and work with a qualified trainer to help your dog with their anxieties.
Nervousness and tension:
Common signs of nervousness, beyond body tension and pinned ears, includes lip-licking, yawning, scratching out of context, moving away, and whale eye.
These behaviors are known by a few names: appeasement, displacement, or submissive behaviors. They are perfectly normal behaviors (any dog can lick their lips, yawn, scratch, etc. without it being negative), but they appear in odd contexts.
When they yawn or lick their lips while you hug them, they are expressing they're uncomfortable and would like some space (notice the theme? Space...). Hugs, among other things like getting in their face, sitting on their bed, etc., are usually things dogs don't care for. If your dog expresses something out of place, listen to their body language. Instead of a hug, give them a nice scratch behind the ear or a good back rub.
Other areas where you might see these behaviors are during training, on a stressful walk, car rides, and when greeting new people and dogs.
Body Language Conclusion:
Remember the context! Context means everything in body language: a lip lick may be a content signal or it can be a stress signal, you must look at the situation and the rest of the dog's body language.
Take time to watch your furry family member, they are more intricate and emotional than they're given credit for. Enjoy happy times, be there for them in rough times, and give them the support they give you.
Most importantly, enjoy every adventure together!
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